Rednecromancer

Blue and Gold book value

I got my copy of the West Virginia Encyclopedia yesterday and I couldn't be more tickled.  Of course I am not too happy that the mail woman left it sitting on top of my mail box.  What part of “bound printed material”  would lead one to believe that this cardboard box and contents would be safe out in the elements?  Good thing it was a pretty day unlike most in the last few weeks.

Yes, getting this volume rained on would be a shame because it is a lovely book both inside and out. Cosmetically it is beautiful and reminds you of the way books used to be bound.  It has a midnight blue, cloth cover with gold foil print on the spine and a dust jacket featuring a star pattern quilt.  It is quite large at 8.5” x 11” and 944  pages thick. and just screams to be placed on one of Dan Pleska's dictionary stands.

 

As nice as the book is on its exterior it is the contents of this encyclopedia that really makes it a must have.  The working slogan of the book was, “all there is to know about West Virginia.”  Now being the picky malcontent that I am, I have found a few glaring omissions (like no WSAZ Mr. Cartoon entry) but by and large I would say that the slogan is a fact.  The encyclopedia contains over 2,200 entries by over 600 contributors. Yours truly is among those 600 as is Cat Pleska from Mouth of the Holler.  In addition to the exhaustive list of facts about the Mountain State the layout of the pages and the editing is of such quality to make the Encyclopedia Britannica proud.  According to the West Virginia Humanities Council that produced this book, the project took nine years and over a million dollars to complete.  Money and time very well spent.

 

The fact that this book is so nicely done is without a doubt because of Ken Sullivan the editor and executive director of the West Virginia Humanities Council.  As some of our readers may know, Ken was the editor who guided Goldenseal to its place as the finest state sponsored folklife publication in the nation.  While a graduate student studying folklore at Ohio State and before I moved to Charleston, I heard members of the folklore community praising Goldenseal as the “gold standard” of state folklore publications.  Mr. Sullivan has brought the same level of quality to the West Virginia Encyclopedia with the assistance of Debby Sonis another Goldenseal alumna.

 

No home in West Virginia should be without this book.  It is expensive at $45 but you get what you pay for and what is $45, but the cost of a video game.  This book will still be worth $45 long after Travis gets bored of Grand Theft Auto VI.  Beyond the proud homes of West Virginia anyone who has a love for Appalachia should own this encyclopedia.  Since West Virginia is in the unique position of being the only state with all of its counties within the bounds of Appalachia, the West Virginia Encyclopedia is also an encyclopedia of Appalachia.  And a darn nice one at that.

 

 

Paragraphs of Praise and Encouragement

The Hillbilly Congress database has been updated.

As I mentioned in a previous post, some months ago I emailed all 26 of the United States Senators who represent states with Appalachian counties.  I invited the senators to send me a single paragraph each with a message of praise and encouragement for the Appalachian people.  I was very disappointed that not a single senator took me up on my offer to host their paragraph.  The fact that my senators from Virginia did not even respond to me shows a lack of service.  The fact that one had his eye on a run for the White House and did not respond shows a total lack of political savvy.  No wonder he lost his senate seat.

We now have a new class of freshmen senators and I think these individuals deserve a chance to speak to the people of Appalachia.  It had been suggested that if I wanted a response from a senator, I should write a letter on a lobbyist's stationery.  I cannot be that cynical yet, but perhaps the ease and lack of expense of email causes email to be seen as a less worthy mode of communication.  I did not mean to mislead my readers when I said that correspondence from a constituent is treated with great respect by most elected officials.  That was my experience as an aide in the Ohio House of Representatives, but then again that was before the widespread use of email. 

This time I am making contact by telephone.  I have unlimited long distance and the important thing here is not whether I can get a United States Senator to respond to me but to collect these paragraphs.  I believe too strongly in the better angels of our nature not to think that all of our senators would like an opportunity to do some cheer leading for the Appalachian people, even the folks who did not respond before.  It is just up to me to convince them that this is a proper venue for their message.

Teaching young Appalachians at WVSC taught me that a word of encouragement in the ear of an Appalachian is a force multiplier for good.  To that end I invite anyone, from the halls of Washington to the aisles of Wal-Mart to send your message of encouragement to the people of Appalachia.

Hunting wild games

Aright here is something stupid to play with.

Stupid Sheep Game

I made this a while back using a free utility.  The exploding sheep game was just an exercise that I used to familiarize myself with the program in hopes that I could create something better.  Naturally that better game would have an Appalachian theme.  Being the hopeless hillbilly slacker that I am, I never got around to doing it.

 

As a matter of fact I have had the idea for computer games based in Appalachia kicking around in my skull for years.  Even before the Redneck Rampage series, NASCAR and hunting and fishing games I have thought about Appalachian based computer games.  I obviously want games that portray us as the good and clever folk we are not the stereotypes we see in most of the titles mentioned above.  To be sure huntin and feeshin are important elements of Appalachian culture and games that pixelize those skills for enjoyment on your big screen are a good thing but I want more damnit.

 

So here I am once again admitting my shortcomings and begging my fellow hillbillies for a hand.  It seems to work.   When I asked for an Appalachian flag

I got this from Tennessee Jed.  Pretty darn nice.  So I figure I will go to the well again.

 

There are two types of computer games I reckon that would work for us.  If you are reading this website you are probably computer savvy enough and old enough to remember the Zork series of games back in the 1980s.  Those were the most widely known but my friend Scott Adams (not the jerk cartoonist) is considered to be the author of the first commercial text based computer games.  Now they are called interactive fiction or IF.

 

Today with all the wizbang graphics these sorts of games aren't much of a commercial force as one may expect, but they have become a sort of cult hobby enjoyed by a number of folks who have respect for the written word.  The upside to this is that there are a number of free or inexpensive utilities that can help anyone who has an imagination write an interactive fiction game.

 

Obviously the story has to have some sort of mystery to solve or puzzle so that the “reader” can make the right choices and thus win the game.  While words are all that are needed for these game at the very basic level, many of the utilities allow authors to add picture and sound to their fictions. Can you imagine an interactive mystery that features photographs of our hollers and supported by clips of our music?  Could be down right cool.

Interactive Fiction Utilities

Adrift

Inform 7

TADS

 

The other type of game that could work for us is the simple 2D scrolling game or shooting game.  You all know us hillbillies love to shoot and why not?  Like the interactive fiction there are free and inexpensive utilities that can help you. If a no talent like me can not only create but draw his own graphics for a game, I know some of our readers could do a truly amazing job.

Graphical Game Utilities

Game Maker 6.1

RPG Toolkit

Indeed with these games you have to have graphics.  It is always considered best if you have original graphics and sprites but there are loads of free graphics out there and the same goes for sound effects.  Of course there aren't too many computer game sprite sets that feature graphics for use in Appalachian themed games so you will probably have to hand carve your own.

 

We may not have the skills or the cash to produce our own Appalachian based television sitcom or mystery shows but a simple text adventure game or 2D shooter may be within our power to create.

 

So easy a hillbilly could do it

Is it just me or could the Geico cavemen be a stand in for a certain type of Appalachian diaspora? Yes, I realize that this extinct branch of the human race is perfect because it could be any minority group that is often the victim of the thoughtless “mainstream” but this is an Appalachian website, Skippy and here we look at things through the eyes of Appalachians or not at all.  I have not yet read comparisons made between the Geico cavemen and hillbillies but I have seen some posts that draw comparisons between the cavemen and gay men or native Americans.  I sincerely doubt anyone at the ad agency even thought about hillbillies as one of the groups that the cavemen represents since most people are under the mistaken notion that being a hillbilly is some sort of life choice vaguely tied to some geographic location and not an ethnic group.

 

Now certainly the main goal of the commercials is to make folks laugh so that in the future whenever they hear the name Geico they are instantly put in a good mood, thus making it easier for Geico to sell their insurance.  Many advertising campaigns work on this obviously successful premise.  But for such a commercial to draw in the “culturally hip” viewer, it has to be pretty clever. 

 

The caveman commercials have been running since 2005 and there are seven that I am aware of.

 

The original with the caveman sound man.

The three cavemen watching the ad in a Manhattan apartment

The apology to the two cavemen in the restaurant

The caveman and the poster in the airport

The caveman and the therapist

The caveman and the “FoxNews” reporters

The three cavemen at the party

 

Each one of these commercials hits upon an area of emotion or an experience that I have experienced since leaving my Appalachian home.  I really hate Deconstructionist theory and I am not too sad that Jacques Derrida  is dead, but I do think there is more going on in these commercials than even the creators realize and this comes from these little nuances that were placed in the ads.  The producers of the commercials placed these elements in the ads for a sophisticated comic effect but in doing so they also bring a real truth to the series.

 

The first commercial is simple enough.  First three caveman ads on YouTube “It is so easy to use geico.com a caveman could do it.”  I find it interesting that insults aimed at hillbillies are about as likely to come in advertising as in other media such as television sitcoms and movies so this is another similarity we share with the poor cavemen.

There are two things going on here from a hillbilly prospective.  The first is the situation where an outsider thinks that it is acceptable to degrade your group.  Often the person making the offensive comment is unaware of your membership.  As a matter of fact this is the only face to face situation I can recall.  It has always been a person saying something stupid and insulting about Appalachians when they were unaware that I was one.  Some of us have leveled our accent and don't say worsh (to outsiders) so it is possible to hide our Appalachianess from those folks who are culturally unaware.  You will note that the spokesman says, “I didn't know that you were there” after the offended caveman storms out.  So it is alright to insult folks as long as they aren't around? Obviously not and the producers know this but that is what someone in this situation would say.

 

The second element here is confronting the insult.  Now I am embarrassed to say that I don't think that I have ever been quite so animated as the caveman when confronting someone who insulted me for being Appalachian or a hillbilly.  Sure I have punched folks for other insults but for the hillbilly insult I can't remember doing more than stating that I was Appalachian and letting the asshole hang in the awkward silence.  I have however, overheard my wife going at a close friend or family member over an obvious hillbilly crack.  I was on the other side of the house so I did not witness it visually but, “I'll tell you one fucking thing, those hillbillies treat me like a fucking princess and they would do anything for me” pretty much gives you a clue as to what type of comment preceded her tirade. 

 

Most of the time I have been alone watching TV or reading a magazine when I have encountered a slight on my Appalachian heritage.  When the insult is face to face I am usually representing another entity or in a situation that demands restraint.  I bet many in the general public would be shocked to learn that they in fact did not have their asses kicked by hillbillies they had just insulted.  I am not sure if they would be shocked that their unintended victim was a hillbilly or that a hillbilly gave up a chance to kick someones ass.

 

To be continued.